Monday, July 17, 2017

An Equine Gestal Coaching session

I'm often asked to explain an Equine Gestalt Coaching session--here is a wonderful example:
I had a client recently who felt he was never in his body. One of the first things he said was, "I want to be in my body. I think a lot of my physical ailments might subside if I could be comfortable in my body."

We worked through a couple of older issues before bringing Rayn into the coaching barn with us. As we talked more about his wish of being in his body, Rayn went from standing quietly with us to a big stretch upward. Have you ever seen a cat stretch by arching it's neck and back? That is what she looked a 1,200 pound version. I didn't think much of it until she did it again, and then again--this time looking me in the eye. 

"Ah. Yes, I hear you." I thought to her. I then asked the client what he was feeling when he saw her stretching like that. He smiled. "I feel like she's showing me how good it feels to be in my body. That it's a safe place to be. I can just "feel" the stretch she is showing me."

Immediately after he said that, Rayn lay down next to us. Now, know that we are in a 24'x24' barn. While it's just the client and me in our chairs, it's not a lot of space and I've never had a horse lay down in there before. Rayn went down with her back to us and, again, looked over at me from one eye.

:-) "Yes, yes. Thank you."

I laughed, "Ok, well you know horses. This is not normal. What do you make of this?" He immediately blurted out, "That I can be in my body and JUST RELAX in it. It's not a fuss or a fight. I'm safe in here. I can own this space. I deserve to take up this spot. I can have my boundaries and just relax."

How beautiful. Thank you Rayn for sharing what he needed to see in a way that would make a difference to him. I know he won't forget your sweet, soft lesson.

My own lesson from this session was this: I sometimes wait too long before setting a boundary (needing to say no and being scared to do it) and then I feel crotchety, mean, and taken advantage of. When I finally do say no, I'm not kind about it. I'm defensive and that feels icky. Setting boundaries in a healthy way means to say no when I need to and then settling back and relaxing into it--the feeling I got when I saw Rayn lay down next to us. Next time I need to set a boundary, I will think of Rayn and her gentle lesson.

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